Most likely, you have an idea of what healthy and attractive look like. Maybe this is blocking your ability to see your own health and beauty in your current body. This is where you need to be realistic. Is it better to hold out for happiness, health, or beautiful clothes until you reach your ideal body, or is it better to let it go?
Do not cling to body inspo photos from your teenage years, or when you had a lot more time or when you weren't 100% healthy. Is that really something you want to go back to now?
Make yourself comfortable in your current body and accept it for how it is. Wear clothes you feel good in, not what you should be fitting into, and eat to fuel the body you have, not the one you want.